Day 2: Slow it Down

Photo by Kumoma Lab on Unsplash

(NOTE: In the interest of full disclosure, because I work at a charter school that draws from a large population in Maine, we end up with a lot of snow days. In the spirit of posting each day, some days will be more reflective than real time. Here is one of those snow day reflections)

Whenever I’ve been away for awhile, I often find myself disoriented upon my return. I get out of my rhythm. I chat too long with colleagues in the hallway, and suddenly the kids are rushing in, I’ve got only half my papers photocopied, the date on the board is at least a week old, and I am furiously scrawling directions in illegible white board ink.

It can be hard to get my mind back in the game. This has been the point, in the past, at which I start panicking.

Unless I pause. I intentionally slow down my movements, even just a hair. When we are busy, we often start to move more quickly. We rush, and this rushing can exacerbate an already tense nervous system, leading us to feel more frazzled. Half the time when we end up in this state, we lose time by dropping our papers everywhere, spilling our coffee down the front, or forgetting some quintessential item that we have to head back for.

See what happens when you intentionally slow down your walking, even the slightest bit. Bring your attention to the feeling of the body moving, the feet hitting the floor. Notice how it cues your body that you’re okay. It’s going to be okay.

Day 1: To Begin Again, Set an Intention

It’s not just getting to stay in my PJs all day that I value about winter break (though that’s high up there on the list). It’s the opportunity to begin again. It’s the chance for me to reset, to reprioritize, to remember what it is that is important to me when I enter the classroom.

My meditation teachers recently offered us the suggestion that perhaps we could try setting intentions instead of resolutions for the new year. Instead of coming up with some concrete unlikely to obtain SMART goals (ex- I will get all my grading done within two days of an assignment due date. HAHAHAHAHA! Ahahaha. Ha. Sniff), what if we dug a little deeper and used this time to remember how we want to show up in the classroom each day, regardless of what is in front of us?

So think about what qualities you’d like to embody as you enter your classroom this year. What do you aspire to each day, not as an aim to self flagellate when we fall short (which will will), but as a gentle guiding reminder of how you would like to be?

Incline the mind towards the quality, and note the ways you might shift your thoughts and actions to be more in alignment with that intention.

Savoring Appreciation

Photo by rawpixel on Unsplash

There is such a sweetness in the way that kids show their affection. Before leaving on break, I received an index card with a heartfelt thank you, a paper candle holder with a battery-powered candle, and a set of origami hearts affixed to a class note. I notice the warmth this generates deep inside my grinchly heart, and melt at the time and care they have taken to show their appreciation. It’s almost enough to make me forget the shoe someone tried to microwave. (Almost).

The day before break, if even a single child offers you a thank you, have a good break, or a small token of appreciation, see if you can let that sink into your soul.

Have a beautiful break, one and all.

The Blame Game

I don’t know about you, but when my students start acting nutty, I like to start blaming people. First and most obvious, my students, for being totally bonkers and making my life miserable. Secondly, their parents, for not bringing their elves on the shelves to school to keep them in line. And finally, myself, for clearly not creating the boundaries they need to be successful. “If I had done this or that back in September, we wouldn’t be here right now!” I like to admonish.

All of this finger-pointing is to simply escape the discomfort of the reality of what the last week before winter break is. As Brene Brown says, ““blame is simply the discharging of discomfort and pain.”

So what might it look like to notice when we are on the Blame Train and slow down. Be aware of the difficulty of the moment without trying to judge it out of existence (hint: it won’t work). Take a breath and see what can be done, instead of what “should” have been done. It’s too late for that anyway.

(For the record, I actually am not so into the extrinsic motivation inspired by the Elf on a Shelf, and do not want one in my classroom, thank you.)

Find the Joy

Photo by Food Photographer | Jennifer Pallian on Unsplash

Sometimes, I find I really need to challenge myself to find the good.

So this morning, I started the day by prompting, "How can I enjoy today?" 

Just dropping that question in meant that I was looking for ways to enjoy the day rather than steeping in my own angst. I enjoyed a really rich discussion about anticipation in the lives of my students. I relished the pumpkin chocolate chip cookies someone had baked and left in the teacher’s lounge. I took heart in the high fives and knowing glances all of us staff exchanged through the days. Instead of solely focusing on that student who thought it was a good prank to put another student’s shoe in the microwave, I could fully enjoy all the other enjoyable moments that came too.

Break it Down.

Photo by Clay Banks on Unsplash

When I think about a whole week before break, I go bananas.

But when I focus on the school day in front of me, the class in front of me, the specific moment I am in with a class, it suddenly seems much less daunting. In my classes where things are going well, I get to fully enjoy engaging with them. In my classes where they are tough, I can concentrate on the toughness without the added stress of needing it to end.

Because it won't until it does. My needing it to be different doesn't help. So when I catch my mind going there, I visualize the week ahead, breaking down into my day, breaking down into the moment I'm in, as a way of reconnecting and reorienting.

Today, watch the mind’s tendency to try and hold the whole week in your mind. Instruct it to zoom in, closer…closer…closer, until all that is in front fo you is that exact moment in time. See how that can provide relief from what can feel daunting.

Non-judgemental Awareness of Wanting my Egg Nog.

One of my high school students came into class today talking about how he just couldn't wait for break, and how the next few days were going to feel so hard. Dude, I hear you.

In fact, as I scroll through social media these days, all of my teacher friends are posting memes and photos reflecting this deep desire to just be done with it. To get to through this week and to those days of sweet freedom. To end this particularly challenging week of giddy children vibrating with the excitement and/or terror of spending so much time away from school and with their families. 

But that fervent anticipation, that needing it to be over, only compounds the difficulties that often come with the week before break. This is not for us to fight, or tell ourselves we “shouldn’t” feel this way. This is an opportunity to acknowledge exactly what is, without judgment.

The first practice I find most helpful is just to notice my mind is going there. As Dan Siegel says, "Name it to tame it," so I observe, "I am really wanting to be done. I am really wanting to be drinking egg nog at my mom's house in front of the tree." Just saying it out loud helps take some of the intensity our of my feelings and gives them some space to breathe.

So today, if it is true for you, try to acknowledging in yourself that desire for it to be over, and see if that gives you any freedom from the want. It is the want that needs to be heard to continue on.